Time

When I was a kid, I remember rolling my eyes when I heard adults say that time flew by. They'd bang on about the days and weeks flashing by in an instant and how quickly us kids were growing up. I rolled my eyes because I thought it was the biggest over exaggeration.

To me it felt like time practically stood still. At the start of every school year, it seemed like next summer was an eternity away. It took forever for my birthday to roll around and weeks seemed to last an age. Even days had a way of dragging on so much that I thought I might surely die of boredom.

As I got older things started to change. The working week would drag on but the weekend would skip by. When I met my now husband, we lived in different states and only saw each other every six weeks for a while. The time between our visits went so slow and yet no sooner had a weekend together begun, it would be over before we knew it.

And then you have kids. It starts when the second pink line appears. Time seems to pick up a little speed.  At the beginning 9 months seems like a long time, but between doctors visits, ultrasounds and all the shopping, the weeks flash by. Pretty soon you're packing bags and making that exciting/terrifying trip to the hospital to bring a new life into the world. 

But it doesn't end there. That teeny tiny newborn magically turns into a toddler in no time and before you know it your packing the little darlings off to their first day of school. Days begin to blur and one week melds into the next. School, work, meals, chores, it all seems to blend together in a haze of routine.

That's where I am in this life, smack bang in the middle of routine. I have an innate longing to press the pause button and to just take some time out. Time out to find my path, to get focused, to just be with my little family, to be happy. The weeks and months seem to flying past at record speeds and I'm absolutely gob-smacked to find myself in June already.

I'm sure I'm not the only who feels like time is moving faster, but I'm often sure that I'm the only one who feels like time is slipping away. Some days I feel like I'm missing it. Missing life, it's meaning, my purpose, everything.

So what is one to do when the pause button isn't any option? Take it one day at a time? Make time? Focus on the joy in everyday? Take risks? Start doing? Perhaps it's all of the above. This journey to self discovery and love sure is hard work, but as they say nothing that's worthwhile is ever easy.